The Act of Forgiving Yourself
By Mary Lindow
Forgiving Yourself — There IS A Divine Example! 💗
Forgiving yourself by looking for verses in the Bible about this subject is a bit different, but there are principles regarding forgiveness that
should be applied to this much needed dialog.
For example, when God forgives us, it says that He remembers our sins no more (Jeremiah 31:34).
doesn’t mean that our all-knowing Father God forgets, but rather, because He forgives us, He chooses not to bring up our sin in a negative way.
Peter said, “In truth I perceive that God shows
no partiality” (Acts 10:34). Applying “no partiality” to the issues of forgiveness, God does not choose to forgive one person and not another.
He forgives everyone who believes
in Jesus Christ. Applying His “no partiality” standards to ourselves, it is just as important to forgive ourselves as it is to forgive others.
Forgiving Yourself — A Belief System?
Forgiving yourself is extremely important.
There is a tendency in all of us to hold ourselves more accountable than we do others. Well that is, if you
are not a narcissist who rarely admits to their wrong doings.
But that is rooted in pride and a need to keep control. This message is addressing those who are sincerely needing to see that life is
a journey of learning God’s ways and that each step of that journey requires us to leave behind the things that hinder our trust in God.
If we freely admit our sins when his light uncovers them,
he will be faithful to forgive us every time.
God is just to forgive us our sins because of Christ, and he will continue to cleanse us from all unrighteousness, (1 John 1:9).
Perhaps you have been one who can justify forgiving others, even for a heinous offense, yet you find no justification for forgiving yourself for an equal or lesser offense.
Perhaps you believe
that forgiving yourself is not even a consideration because you think that you must hold yourself in a state of constant remembrance, JUST in case, you forget.
Maybe you believe there is a price, some
form of life-long penance that you must pay.
Forgiving yourself is not about forgetting! NO! 🚫
It’s about not bringing the offense up to yourself in negative ways.
Forgiving yourself is simply letting go of what you are holding against yourself so that you can move on with God.
If God has moved on, shouldn’t we do the
Philippians 4:9 states that we are to put into practice those things that we have learned from God and from His Word.
To continue to rehearse
in our thoughts the events of our transgression, goes against Philippians 4:8 which tells us to dwell on whatever is true, noble, right, pure, lovely, and admirable.
Forgiving Yourself — It Takes
Personal Action 🛐
Proverbs 16:25 says, “There is a way that seems right to a man, but its end is the way of death.”
The energy it takes to harbor anger, hatred,
and resentment towards yourself is exhausting. Every bit of energy we give to negative activities and dwelling on regrets, robs us of the energy we need to become the person God wants us to be.
is full of choices and every choice we make will either take us in a positive, life-giving direction or rob us of the opportunity to be a life-giving individual.
Forgiving ourselves doesn’t let us
off the hook, it doesn’t justify what we have done, and it’s not a sign of weakness.
Forgiveness is a choice that takes courage and strength, and it gives us the opportunity to become an overcomer
rather than remaining a victim of our own shame.
If you don’t forgive yourself of past sins, it’s a form of pride. Whenever we enact a different set of rules, a higher set of standards
for ourselves over others, that is pride.
When we can find it within ourselves to forgive others, but not our self, we are saying that we are less capable of making a poor decision than others.
We are somehow more intuitive, wiser, more insightful, more careful than others, and therefore, we are without excuse and should not forgive ourselves.
reject the forgiveness extended to us by God and others, when we refuse to forgive ourselves, what we are doing is setting ourselves above others and that is pride!
Proverbs 16:18 says, “Pride goes
before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall.”
Unforgiveness of oneself will bring self-destruction, a haughty spirit, and a fall.
forgiveness will bring peace.
Forgiving Yourself — Helping Others and Yourself 💞
Forgiving yourself is also important for those in your sphere of influence. It
is a well-known fact that hurting people hurt others.
The longer you avoid forgiving yourself, the longer you allow yourself to harbor the feelings that you deserve to suffer for what you did, the more
explosive you will become and, therefore, the more apt you are to hurt others.
➡️ The reality is that you can’t change what has happened. You can’t restore lives to where they were before
➡️ However, you can make a difference in the lives of others. You can give back some of what you have taken away by finding a different place to invest your time and compassion.
Forgive yourself and let the healing begin!
Forgiving yourself will change the direction of your life!
Look at the prayer below. Read quietly through the following declaration and then read it out loud.
Or maybe you would like to use your own words. Whichever you do, give voice to it.
You need to hear yourself forgive yourself! There is great power in the spoken word!
Dear Heavenly Father,
I understand that there is nothing
to gain by holding myself in unforgiveness and there is everything to gain by releasing myself from unforgiveness and beginning the process of healing.
I want to move forward and make a positive difference
in the future.
I confess the ungodly accountability, self-abasement, and the vows I have made to never forgive myself.
Because Jesus died for my sins,
I choose to forgive myself — to no longer punish myself and be angry with myself.
I forgive myself for letting this hurt control me and for hurting others, out of my hurt.
I repent of this behavior and my attitude.
I ask for Your forgiveness and healing.
God, help me to NEVER again retain unforgiveness of
myself or others.
Thank you for loving me and for Your Grace to move forward with You.
In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
In His Shadow,
~ Mary Lindow ©
” THE MESSENGER ” ~ Mary