God is closest to those with Broken Hearts!

Suffering and the broken hearted . . .




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We Must Suffer With Him?

By Miss Shelly




No one wants to accept the fact that maybe God may have a hand in all this, well frankly, pain and suffering we all go through. Whether it be a loss of a loved one, or suffering from sickness or disease like cancer, or betrayal and abuse from those closest to you; we always wonder why God has “allowed” these things to happen.  It doesn’t make any common sense! We say, “Your will be done . . . Thy kingdom come,” nonchalantly, but when it comes to suffering and affliction in our bodies, or betrayal and abuse, or loss of a loved one, we are angry and don’t want to accept it! And, by all means, how dare God do or have anything to do with it!  Our cry is “Why God?” “Why would a loving God allow this to happen?”


There is a suffering that comes with the consequences of our actions here on earth, and we must remember that there are always consequences for God is a God of Justice and Righteousness, which is the foundation of His Throne.  It’s one of the laws of the universe; whether we like it or not. God will have the last say . . .


There is a deeper meaning to our inconsequential sufferings, however. So deep it can be hard to comprehend. It’s spiritual. It’s persecution in its purest form. It’s persecution directly from the enemy. It’s a stolen opportunity to abuse you. How can it be? The enemy comes to kill, steal and destroy! The truth is, we cannot live our lives here on this earth without the Lord! 


Understand it very clearly, God did not do this . . . or did He? Why would a loving God allow this to happen! Remember His ways are not our ways, and far more deeper than we can imagine! Let’s get out of the box!


It doesn’t matter that the outcome most likely will make you stronger and more compassionate.  It has served a purpose even though it doesn’t make any sense why a loving God would allow this.  So in the midst of it all, you cry again, “Why God?”  



We must remember that the horrible tormenting things that happened to Jesus served a purpose.  Get a grasp of what this all about! They can’t get away with it! The pain and suffering will be turned to nothing but good. It’s a revelation. 



Isaiah 53:10 King James Version (KJV)


10 Yet it pleased the Lord to bruise him; he hath put him to grief: when thou shalt make his soul an offering for sin, he shall see his seed, he shall prolong his days, and the pleasure of the Lord shall prosper in his hand. 


Isaiah 53:5-8


5But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed. 6All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned every one to his own way; and the LORD hath laid on him the iniquity of us all. 7He was oppressed, and he was afflicted, yet he opened not his mouth: he is brought as a lamb to the slaughter, and as a sheep before her shearers is dumb, so he openeth not his mouth. 8He was taken from prison and from judgment: and who shall declare his generation? For he was cut off out of the land of the living: for the transgression of my people was he stricken.



We always skip over the above.  How can Father God want His son to suffer like that?  It really doesn’t make any sense logically.  This is the “elephant in the room” no one wants to talk about!  How can pain and suffering be “good?” “Turn the other cheek?” “What is that all about?”



I hate the lie that once you receive Christ, everything will go great for you! No, you become a target, especially if you serve Him.  We learn over the years, how to overcome the wiles of the devil through prayer and drawing close to the Lord.  The Lord will show us through His Word how to fight and win! We become “overcomers by the blood of the Lamb, and the word of our testimony!”  


Proverbs 3:5-6 King James Version (KJV)


5 Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.


6 In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.


Like you beloved reader, Jesus suffered and was grieved by what He saw and what happened to Him.  He ultimately died of a broken heart.  So He is the expert on a broken heart beloved. He was there when you suffered.  You may not know it, but He was there. It may take a whole lifetime. We just have to give Him our burdens and trust Him each day. “Easier said than done!”


Isaiah 53:2-8 KJV


2For he shall grow up before him as a tender plant, and as a root out of a dry ground: he hath no form nor comeliness; and when we shall see him, there is no beauty that we should desire him. 3He is despised and rejected of men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief: and we hid as it were our faces from him; he was despised, and we esteemed him not. 4Surely he hath borne our grief’s, and carried our sorrows: yet we did esteem him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted.


So, are you despised by others and rejected? Are you a man or woman of sorrows and acquainted with grief? 


One morning, the Intercessor had a conversation with the Lord, but did not expect His response.


“I want so much to be intimate with You Lord!” the Intercessor proclaimed. 


“You are my beloved.” He responded.


“How’s that?”


“Intimacy can mean suffering with Me in all your afflictions, in all your sufferings, and in all your betrayal that you have gone through.”   


“How else will you have a taste of what I went through myself?” “We are intimate beloved!” “Can you see it?”  Her thought soared back in the last almost 7 years.


Experiencing a little of what He went through and going through pain and suffering such as the loss of her husband 7+ years ago and experiencing the tremendous grief that comes with this kind of loss; wondering if it would ever end has caused her to truly understand!  The Intercessor was betrayed and abandoned like most widows. She went through so much loneliness and suffering from her broken heart.  And, she almost died of a “broken heart syndrome.” But she heard the Lord tell her to go to the cardiologist that morning.  She already had a small hole in her heart.  Well, then her heart failed and she collapsed in the doctor’s office and it just so happened that the hospital was right next-door.


Not only that, later, she found out that she had cancer!” How much could she take! Only those who hear the words, “you have breast cancer,” can understand what goes through your mind. She accepted her fate and prepared herself to die just like her two sisters who have passed on, until she heard the Lord say, “I will receive all the glory!”  


“But wait!” “Don’t I have a right to say, ‘Time out!’” “This isn’t fair!” “I just lost my husband!” “Now here I am with breast cancer!” “What is going on?” “Why?” “Why me?” She cried as self-pity crept in, as she opened the door for the snake to whisper in her ear, “How can a loving God do this?” She believed the lies.


Beyond natural reasoning, is when you must choose to rise above the circumstances and see it from the approach of heaven, Lord willing.  When you go through tremendous things yourself and then look at the cross, and His suffering, betrayal, abandonment and sorrow, you have a deeper compassion for Him, and you realize in fact, you are indeed intimate with your Savior, the Lamb of God. It’s a different level of understanding and comprehension beloved reader. “Can you see it?”


It can be a convergence of the natural with the spiritual.  The Intercessor is seeing the Kingdom of Heaven, and the natural coming together and becoming one like it did when Elisha was here and he saw the myriads of angels to war on his behalf. Or when Jesus was here on earth and Heaven came down, and He performed many miracles while He was here on earth. Heaven converged with Earth through the Holy Spirit, and miracles happened. It’s very strange. 


 “Can you see the significance of every single drop of blood shed from His body?” 


She heard her Lord speak.  “There’s Life in the Blood.” The importance of the breaking of His heart becomes revelation today, a convergence of 2000 years ago, with Heaven and with Earth.  “Oh yes, beloved, He understands what you are going through!”


The veil is being removed and revelation is coming as the Ancient of Days reveals it, because she is now having a vision!




Heaven opened wide it’s gates.  It’s an extremely somber atmosphere right now.  Very humbling! In the presence of the King of kings, Lord of lords! Words cannot express the depths how this visit to the very throne of Grace and the embrace of the Love of God through His presence, the words were heard throughout heaven and earth, “Holy . . . Holy . . . Holy!  All anyone could do was try to get as low as they could in His presence! You are undone! The Intercessor WAS UNDONE! All around her she could feel His Most Holy Presence! You will cry out for mercy and tremble, tremble, tremble as she did! 


Oh if she could only get “lower.” Then you would cry for the coals on that alter to cleanse your lips for you knew you were unclean; A woman of unclean lips! She felt so unworthy to be there! If she could sink deep into her bed she would.  The Intercessor worshiped Him with all her being; with all that she had within her! He was and is everything to her!  She didn’t want to leave Heaven and live on earth without Him! Without Him she knew she was absolutely nothing but dust!  “Let Heaven invade earth!” “Thy Kingdom come!”



Now she saw her Beloved stumbling in Jerusalem 2000 years ago, all bruised and bloody, carrying the cross to the hill of the skull.  She heard His breathing heavily and almost felt the warm drips of His blood fall on the ground, as He walked slowly toward Golgotha.  She saw one drop and looked closely.  It was filled with the universe.  Another drop revealed chaos and destruction in the earth. The Blood that He shed was for the past, the present, and the future people whose names are written in the Lamb’s Book of Life.



The sounds of the people surrounding Him, as He stumbled were muffled.  Once and a while the words vehemently spewed out, “Crucify Him” would come forward, and take the stage for a brief moment; But for the most part, His tremendous suffering and pain stood out to her.  She could tell that He was in tremendous pain both physically and emotionally. She felt helpless!  “How can He step forward?” She thought. He is carrying her sins and the sins of the world!  All hell broke loose against her Beloved.  The demonic world laughed mockingly at the Son of God that day as He carried His cross! They believed their own deception that they would not have to deal with this “Man” ever again!  Tears streamed down her cheeks in great compassion. She felt completely helpless.  The pain that He was feeling stood out with every Holy step.  It was so painful to watch.


She recognized it.  She closed her eyes as if that would help.  They hated Him without reason.  She had been hated for no reason.  She remembered this as a child and later as a princess at homecoming. Who was this “new” girl who was voted to be princess at her high school. She was so shy.  She didn’t want all this attention.  The popular girls hated her.  Oh and she “knew” rejection, when her daddy put her and her older sister in an orphanage when she was born.


The people surrounding her Lord had become vessels of satan as they shrieked disdainfully, “Crucify Him!” He was unrecognizable as His body screamed out in pain in response to being beaten, bruised, chastised, and bleeding. His heart broken as He so much LOVED the ones screaming in His ears, even those who beat and bruised Him.  Have you been abused by a loved one?  It doesn’t make sense to your brain, when they scream at you and  . . . do the abuse.  “I don’t want to talk about it!” But you who have been abused know.  We are damaged.


Then to her amazement, the Intercessor saw that there was a processional with dancing going before Him on the way to the Cross!  “Huh?” You could barely see them. They were almost invisible.  It was “celebration” from another dimension!


“What?” People from Heaven were celebrating before the Lord on the pathway to the cross! “How could this be?” She whispered.  


Picture this; The Intercessor was back in Jerusalem as part of the crowd watching Jesus, her Beloved, carrying the Cross-toward Golgotha 2000 years ago, yet at the same time Heaven had converged and celebrated this Great Event on the way to the cross! God wanted her to see that in reality the death, and resurrection of the Cross was a very good thing! For without this event, she and the whole earth could not be reconciled back to the Father in Heaven and live with Him forever! 


“It was so pleasing to the Father!” She heard.


Let me get this clear! It was like the celebration was here on earth. She saw worshippers dancing before His procession to the place of death from another dimension.  Heaven on earth, celebrating the Cross! It was like what’s going on now with what happened 2000 years ago for the world!  A convergence of today and back then when He was so alone! All of Heaven was there! There is always a celebration in Heaven! It was the most significant event of the Universe!!!


The presence of the Lord was so strong! The Intercessor was shaking like a leaf trembling with her teeth chattering! She couldn’t control her body at this time!  His Holy presence embracing her was too much! It was the grief, the pain she saw, and His Presence all at once and she was undone!  Could she even truly comprehend what was really happening? 


It was like the procession of crossing over the Jordan into the Promised Land beginning with the worshipers first!  Jesus was crossing over from death to life everlasting taking the keys of death, hell and grave with Him! He was transformed when He rose from the dead! Oh death, where is your sting? We are crossing over from death to life!  “Oh God thank you for this revelation!” How could it be? The pain and the suffering that she went through!  She felt the Truth pass by and grabbed her as she embraced it.  What a revelation!



“There is only One found worthy!” Yet, she was invited to intimacy with Him! She was His Bride! We are the Bride of Christ! She felt completely accepted, forgiven and cleansed by the Blood shed for her at the Cross! She remembers her past . . .


Baptism . . .



The River Jordan


 The River Jordan unfolds a backdrop to many historical events in the Bible. One may think of the Jordan plain that was plush, green, and fertile, for which Lot chose to live before the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah. One’s memory delights in remembering the miracle of the crossing of the people of Israel on dry land in the Jordan River to possess the Promised Land. Take great enjoyment thinking about Naaman dipping in the River Jordan seven times, coming out totally healed of the dreaded leprosy.


 What joy in seeing in the mind’s eye, the miracle of Yeshua baptized in the River Jordan and coming up. It thrills us all to imagine the white Dove descending upon Him and Father God speaking the most powerful words of proclaiming His approval from Heaven! Yes, one could hear the deep, deep majestic voice of our Daddy in Heaven with such authority! So in conclusion, it would seem that anyone traveling to Israel must have on their "to do" list, "baptism in the River Jordan."


Therefore, the Intercessor and her family chose to be baptized in the Jordan River on their trip to Israel. As the buss dropped off the sightseers, they all quickly moved up to the fence to see the famous Jordan River . . . the same for which their Savior was baptized in. What a thrill it was to be at that very same river! As you looked down at the slow moving greenish brown colored river, you could see the extremely large catfish resting on the bottom.


“They are huge” she gasped, a bit intimidated at their size. The Intercessor would take a deep breath in gathering up her courage to go into the depths of the Jordan with these docile and harmless giants. This was too good of an opportunity to pass up, despite their horrendous size!


This was one of the highlights of the whole trip as the Intercessor and her husband decided to renew their wedding vows in the Jordan as well. They needed to.  She remembered, the pastor proclaiming that the bad memories of the past were to flow down the river to “be remembered no more.” The flow of tears that day was tremendous! This time, this was tears of joy instead of grief because her husband and she was reconciled to one another. 




The Intercessor was back at the River Jordan where she was baptized on one of her trips to Israel. In fact, it was the very same place! As she looked to see the face of her pastor, she was unexpectedly surprised to find it was not her pastor at all, performing the baptism! It was Jesus, her Beloved!


In addition, if you looked closer at the river, you would see that it was no longer green but Blood red! Yes, it was flowing with the Blood of Christ. As she submitted herself to her beloved Savior, He proceeded to baptize her . . . not once, not twice, but seven times in the Jordan River! Dream ends. 


It has been almost 7 years since her husband passed away.  She has experienced so much adversity and pain these years.  Once she heard her Lord say, “Seven times hotter!” Each year brought a “new” excruciating thing.  From her husband’s death to abandonment of her friends and family (except her son and daughter), to almost dying of a broken heart syndrome.  She had 100 letters sent to her by a lawyer about foreclosing her home that she loved.  Her daughter and she lived in the building that they owned without a shower or kitchen for two years.  The city tried to take the building through lies and deceit.  She found out she had breast cancer and for two years through surgeries, chemotherapy, and radiation she finally overcame.  Now she has been diagnosed with type 2 Diabetes from the chemo and steroids they gave her.  And lastly, she found out that the tomaxifen drug she must take for 5 years causes cancer in her uterus.  She will soon have a complete hysterectomy.  


But, it was 7 years this last January 18th.  Could this be the end of the baptism by fire? She knows she is much stronger now from this entire affliction. 


Revelation of His Blood and the power of His Blood are being released to His Bride! Healing and Deliverance through increased faith in the power of His Blood is coming to cleanse the Bride of Christ! As the enemy has come in like a flood, the Lord is raising the standard, and the standard is His Blood and His Word! He is covering us with His Blood! He is cleansing us of all unrighteousness! He has fought those battles for her as she cried out to Him in her dismay.  So allow Him to finish His work beloved!


 Allow Him to circumcise your hearts in preparation to the crossing over. The time to cross over into the Promised Land is upon us! Are you submitted, and totally surrendered to Christ? Then resist the devil, and he must flee! Therefore, the Battle belongs to the Lord (of Hosts)! Only the Blood and the Word (the sword of the Spirit) can protect us from the wiles of the devil, as we submit and enter into our rest ceasing from our own works as God did from His.  Trust in Him beloved, lean not unto your own understanding, in all your ways, acknowledge Him and He will direct your paths.  It’s deep, so very deep.  


 We are the overcoming church of our Lord and Savior Yeshua Ha Mashiach (Jesus the Christ)! Dwell in the light of the Word of God, fellowship with God and Jesus and His Blood will cleanse you of all unrighteousness! Strongholds are coming down! Sickness and disease will no longer overtake His precious Bride! Allow the gift of repentance to come into your home as it is being released in the heavenlies! The cry for repentance is at hand! Praise and Glory is to God our Father! 


2Ki 5:14


Then went he down, and dipped himself seven times in Jordan, according to the saying of the man of God: and his flesh came again like unto the flesh of a little child, and he was clean.


Ezekiel 16:8


Now when I passed by thee, and looked upon thee, behold, thy time [was] the time of love; and I spread my skirt over thee, and covered thy nakedness: yea, I sware unto thee, and entered into a covenant with thee, saith the Lord GOD, and thou becamest mine.



Hebrews 9:12


Neither by the blood of goats and calves, but by his own blood he entered in once into the holy place, having obtained eternal redemption [for us].






Hebrews 9:22


And almost all things are by the law purged with blood; and without shedding of blood is no remission.




Revelation 12:11


And they overcame him by the blood of the Lamb, and by the word of their testimony; and they loved not their lives unto the death.




Isaiah 53:5


But he [was] wounded for our transgressions, [he was] bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace [was] upon him; and with his stripes we are healed.




Romans 5:8


But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.




Romans 5:9


Much more then, being now justified by his blood, we shall be saved from wrath through him.




Romans 6:3


Know ye not, that so many of us as were baptized into Jesus Christ were baptized into his death? 


Romans 6:4


Therefore we are buried with him by baptism into death: that like as Christ was raised up from the dead by the glory of the Father, even so we also should walk in newness of life.



Romans 6:5


For if we have been planted together in the likeness of his death, we shall be also [in the likeness] of [his] resurrection: 


Rom 6:6


Knowing this, that our old man is crucified with [him], that the body of sin might be destroyed, that henceforth we should not serve sin.


Romans 6:7


For he that is dead is freed from sin. 


Romans 6:8


Now if we be dead with Christ, we believe that we shall also live with him: 


Romans 6:9


Knowing that Christ being raised from the dead dieth no more; death hath no more dominion over him. 


Romans 6:10


For in that he died, he died unto sin once: but in that he liveth, he liveth unto God. 


Romans 6:11

Likewise reckon ye also yourselves to be dead indeed unto sin, but alive unto God through Jesus Christ our Lord. KJV



1John 1:7


But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship one with another, and the blood of Jesus Christ his Son cleanseth us from all sin.




Romans 4:7


[Saying], Blessed [are] they whose iniquities are forgiven, and whose sins are covered.



The River Jordan originates in the Hills between Mt. Hermon and Mt. Lebanon and travels down through the Sea of Galilee down south to end at the Dead Sea! As the Intercessor was washed seven times, her sins were to go to the Dead Sea to be remembered no more! The Dead Sea is so full of salt that nothing can live in it. Salt cleanses.





An Old Testament expression for an everlasting covenant (Num 18:19). Salt was an important commodity in the ancient world. It was used for seasoning foods as well as to purify and preserve certain substances. Thus, a covenant of salt indicated faithfulness, dependability, and durability.


(from Nelson's Illustrated Bible Dictionary, Copyright © 1986, Thomas Nelson Publishers)


Mark 9:49-50


49 For every one shall be salted with fire, and every sacrifice shall be salted with salt.


50 Salt is good: but if the salt have lost his saltness, wherewith will ye season it? Have salt in yourselves, and have peace one with another.



Hebrews 8:12-13


12 For I will be merciful to their unrighteousness, and their sins and their iniquities will I remember no more .


13 In that he saith, A new covenant, he hath made the first old. Now that which decayeth and waxeth old is ready to vanish away.




Hebrews 10:17-25


17 And their sins and iniquities will I remember no more .

18 Now where remission of these is, there is no more offering for sin.

19 Having therefore, brethren, boldness to enter into the holiest by the blood of Jesus,

20 By a new and living way, which he hath consecrated for us, through the veil, that is to say, his flesh;

21 And having an high priest over the house of God;

22 Let us draw near with a true heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled from an evil conscience, and our bodies washed with pure water.

23 Let us hold fast the profession of our faith without wavering; (for he is faithful that promised;)

24 And let us consider one another to provoke unto love and to good works:

25 Not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as the manner of some is; but exhorting one another: and so much the more, as ye see the day approaching.




Now, there appeared a crown on her head, and all she could do was literally throw it down before Him who sits on the throne!  So unworthy! It was like His Kingdom is coming closer to this earth! It’s on its way! God loves us so much He wants to be with us! A portal open for His Bride!


“Thy Kingdom Come, Thy will be done!” She proclaimed.


His Spirit let her know that all this pain and suffering she had been going through was supernaturally, and spiritually significant and in a strange weird way to her spiritual intellect, “Holy!” How could this be! “How could this be?” She exclaimed. It didn’t make any sense to her logical mind! So deep!


“How could this be?” She cried. Oh how she so deeply LOVED Him, whom her heart desires more than anything! “Oh God I worship YOU!” She proclaimed as His presence engulfed her.  “I Love You with all my heart, all my mind, all my soul, all my strength!” Tears streaming down her cheeks. She responded. “In You I exist!” “In You I live and have my being!” “My hope is only in YOU!”  “Oh God, You are my hiding place!”  “I WORSHIP YOU!” These words did not do any of it justice! She could barely get the words out!


Then she saw in the spirit again, her beloved Savior, the Lamb of God, walking on the Della via la Rosa covered in His own blood and dripping. She saw each drop fall on the ground with such significance that not one drop of blood was wasted.  It was for you beloved reader.  It was for her! Someday, may we all get a revelation of this!  All she could hear with each step that He took, how Holy . . . Holy . . . Holy  . . . He was and how spiritually (reality) significant every affliction, every bruise (bleeding internally) and every pain and suffering He went through! It was all so HOLY and so pure and so perfect! 


All she could see and feel was this supernatural, overwhelming LOVE of God everywhere! “Why couldn’t they see it?” “Why couldn’t they feel it?! Tears streamed down her face in total response and compassion, as she felt and observed His LOVE toward those who were screaming, “Crucify Him,” with such hatred and disdain toward her precious Beloved Savior! 


Then, it was like she was inside Him, filled with His Love toward all of them! And it hurt so deeply, like the stripes on His back! Yet, she knew it was so Holy . . . Holy . . . Holy! As He took each step slowly toward Golgotha she heard, “Holy!” step “Holy!” step “Holy!” and He took steps, oh so significant and meaningful, slowly, toward the place where He would be crucified, nailing her sins and the sins of the world to that Cross, as His body raked with pain! More tears flooded her soul as she saw it all in the spirit! She wept and she wept and she wept! “So Holy!” “So very Holy!” 


So grateful was she to see this and get a glimpse of the revelation of the ramifications of what the Lamb of God did for you and I!  “So Holy!” “The violent take it by force!” The wicked ones were so deceived! The rock they tried to push on Jesus fell back on them and crushed them!  They were defeated! 


Then He took His last breath as He spoke, “It is finished!”  The sorrow she felt couldn’t compare to the significance this had.


The Intercessor had a revelation of the reality of His path to the altar as the Lamb of God, a living sacrifice for her and the world! 


Now she sees herself as “much afraid” (in the book “Hinds feet in High Places”) on the altar with the pain and suffering she, herself must go through in her life was to serve a most high purpose! Little did she know that she had been laid bare on the altar these last 7 years! With every piercing, every affliction, every betrayal; how it served the highest function for her, for each and every one of us here on this earth!  Pain and suffering whether it be physical or emotional, it was done purposefully. Turned to nothing but good and, oh so Holy because she forgave those who betrayed her! She let it all go into the hands of the only One who could carry these burdens!


God knew what it would take to make us Holy once again from the fall! The acceptance of the Lamb of God, who came in the flesh to suffer and die for our sins! It was the Blood. It was complete surrender and putting our trust deeply in the Lord, and accepting His living sacrifice, even though in this earth it “looked” like He was defeated and abused, betrayed, and distressed with no purpose!  It was His righteousness, not ours! We are tasting that the Lord is “good,” through learning and experiencing a little of what our Beloved went through for us all.  All she could do was cry Holy, Holy, Holy, and cry out for mercy because she was in the presence of the Most High God! “The violent take it by force!”


Finally, after hours, the essence of His presence dissipated, all she wanted to do was try desperately to grasp it all and remember every second of it!  “Oh please God, let me never forget this moment!” She responded.


She didn’t want to leave! The only place she wanted to be was with His unconditional, acceptance of her and lay face forward in the dust, before this most awesome Being filled with the most powerful force in the Universe . . .LOVE! 


So here she is back in her bed, in pain, and feeling the pain of the removal of her port catheter that was used to put the chemotherapy in her body. She was feeling the pain of her arthritic neck and back.  She was feeling the pain of her joints, a side effect from the chemo/radiation therapy.  As she moved her knees and got out of bed, she felt the pain in her joints, as she walked toward her chair at her desk. She must write this down before she forgets! You suffering? Have you been abused? Are you in grief? Well, be exceedingly glad; for so they prosecuted the prophets ahead of you.  You are her “brethren.”


“For it became Him, for whom are all things, and by whom are all things, in bringing many sons unto glory, to make the Captain of their salvation perfect through sufferings.  For both He that sanctifies and they who are sanctified are all of one: for which cause He is not ashamed to call them brethren,”   Hebrews 2:10-11.


John 15 New King James Version (NKJV)


The True Vine


15 “I am the true vine, and My Father is the vinedresser. 2 Every branch in Me that does not bear fruit He takes away;[a] and every branch that bears fruit He prunes, that it may bear more fruit. 3 You are already clean because of the word which I have spoken to you. 4 Abide in Me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in Me.


5 “I am the vine, you are the branches. He who abides in Me, and I in him, bears much fruit; for without Me you can do nothing. 6 If anyone does not abide in Me, he is cast out as a branch and is withered; and they gather them and throw them into the fire, and they are burned. 7 If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, you will[b] ask what you desire, and it shall be done for you. 8 By this My Father is glorified, that you bear much fruit; so you will be My disciples.


Love and Joy Perfected


9 “As the Father loved Me, I also have loved you; abide in My love. 10 If you keep My commandments, you will abide in My love, just as I have kept My Father’s commandments and abide in His love.


11 “These things I have spoken to you, that My joy may remain in you, and that your joy may be full. 12 This is My commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. 13 Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for his friends. 14 You are My friends if you do whatever I command you. 15 No longer do I call you servants, for a servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all things that I heard from My Father I have made known to you. 16 You did not choose Me, but I chose you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit, and that your fruit should remain, that whatever you ask the Father in My name He may give you. 17 These things I command you, that you love one another.


The World’s Hatred


18 “If the world hates you, you know that it hated Me before it hated you. 19 If you were of the world, the world would love its own. Yet because you are not of the world, but I chose you out of the world, therefore the world hates you. 20 Remember the word that I said to you, ‘A servant is not greater than his master.’ If they persecuted Me, they will also persecute you. If they kept My word, they will keep yours also. 21 But all these things they will do to you for My name’s sake, because they do not know Him who sent Me. 22 If I had not come and spoken to them, they would have no sin, but now they have no excuse for their sin. 23 He who hates Me hates My Father also. 24 If I had not done among them the works which no one else did, they would have no sin; but now they have seen and also hated both Me and My Father. 25 But this happened that the word might be fulfilled which is written in their law, ‘They hated Me without a cause.’[c]


The Coming Rejection


26 “But when the Helper comes, whom I shall send to you from the Father, the Spirit of truth who proceeds from the Father, He will testify of Me. 27 And you also will bear witness, because you have been with Me from the beginning.



King James Version – Galatians 2:20


I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me.


“I now give myself wholly to You Lord,” she whispered.

There is a hope

Cast down . . .

(Psalms 42:11 NKJV)

Why are you cast down, O my soul? And why are you disquieted within me?

Hope in God; For I shall yet praise Him, The help of my countenance and my God.

A broken and contrite heart He will NOT despise!

Psalm 34:18

The LORD is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit.


It's not an accident that you are brought to this web site beloved child of God. Yes, all of us are His children. This website is designed for the broken hearted. . . You!


Whether you have lost a loved one, are terminally ill, fearful, terrified, lonely, rejected, suicidal,  abused, and wounded, be rest assured God sees all. In fact, He actually feels all your pain and suffers with you. No one in this world can do that for you like God the Father, God the Son (Yahshua), and God the Spirit of the Living God--the three are One!

Your tears are collected in a bottle and directly taken to heaven for God to "hear."

King James Bible (Cambridge Ed.)

Thou tellest my wanderings: put thou my tears into thy bottle: are they not in thy book?

Psalm 56:8


Take the time to spend with whatever the page the Lord has led you to on the left side of this page.

Each page opens up to a plethra of more pages designed for your healing process. . . if you allow God to heal you! Don't hesitate to look in each one you may be interested with. The Lord has designed this whole website for the Brokenhearted . . . YOU!


He is speaking to you now and wants you to know that He deeply LOVES you with a Love that surpasses all other kinds of "love." You are deeply loved and completely acceptable to Him. His Love covers all your pain, all your suffering, all you . . . especially your Broken Heart!


"Oh My prescious one! I am here for you . . . waiting for you to come to Me because you are weary; Oh so weary and heavy laden! Come to Me in your sorrow, in your pain and suffering! I am  here for you because I deeply, deeply Love you! Can you feel My presence? Draw close to Me beloved! Draw ever so close! I Love  you with such a Love that you can't imagine how much! Pour your heart out to Me! Give Me all your burdens for I care for you and deeply . . . yes, deeply Love you!" 




A life of Brokenness 

by the Intercessor



As the Intercessor looked dangerously back, she discovers her life was flooded with a river of brokenness . . . from the time she was born till at present, age 64.  Her mother was inflicted with pancreatic cancer when she was conceived. The cancer had spread throughout her mother's body and when the Intercessor was born, her mother stayed in the hospital and died three weeks later.


Back in those days (the 1940's-1950's), many children were put in orphanages in the US and so it was not unusual for her father to put both she and her two-year-old sister in an orphanage as well.  Later, after three years, her father took them out to live with their new mother and other brothers and sisters.


It was a long difficult road as her family of ten (eight kids) struggled to make ends meet. She was poor.  Other children looked condescendingly at her and her third hand clothes, clean but worn out. It was quite challenging to rise above the haughty, pompous attitudes of many of the children at school.


Many years later, once married, the Intercessor's husband had come from a family that drank excessively and partied all the time.  He was already alcoholic and combined other drugs to cover his own sorrow of the day. The only thing that saved him was accepting the Lord Yahshua as Savior which set him free from the bondage of drugs and alcohol. . . He had become a mighty man of God.


. . .And at present, her husband had quietly passed away, when it seemed that the surgery he had was successful and the doctors had expressed the fact that her husband was doing so well and on the road to recovery.  His heart had failed after all the extensive surgery. They had just come home from getting the cathedar finally out and everything looked encouraging. Her husband crawled into bed and took a deep breath and died peacefully. 


In shock, the Intercessor cried out to God to bring him back. When the EMT’s came, she got on her knees to lament, but she heard God clearly say, "let him go!" It was his time to go.


Her life drastically changed over night! 


One day, the Intercessor couldn’t take any more as she cried out to God. “No more God!” “Please . . . no more!”  Tears deluging her soul. 


“Why was I born?” She had cried out in despair, descending down into the dungeon of depression. Deep sorrow had set in. The suffering was more than enough that she thought that she could handle. The pieces of her cracked heart broke open and green slimy smelly self-pity had poured out.


She knew the word however. “God doesn’t give you anything more than you can handle,” whispered in her ears. It was her beloved friend, her comforter, the Holy Spirit (Ruach HaKodesh in Hebrew) speaking quietly to her soul. She recognized the voice, shaking her head in denial grasping onto the voice of the stranger.  “He doesn’t love you!” Hissed the wicked one speaking loud and clear, taking advantage of the excruciating pain she was feeling. Tears flooded her soul as she lamented over her life, choosing to look at only the negative events of her life . . . instead of all the moments the Lord had divinely intervened every time she cried out in despair. When would she learn her lesson? God never left her nor forsook her to this day, even though it appeared that way. 


King James Version 

Hebrews 13:5 - [Let your] conversation [be] without covetousness; [and be] content with such things as ye have: for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee.

Deuteronomy 31:8 - And the LORD, he [it is] that doth go before thee; he will be with thee, he will not fail thee, neither forsake thee: fear not, neither be dismayed.

Deuteronomy 31:6 - Be strong and of a good courage, fear not, nor be afraid of them: for the LORD thy God, he [it is] that doth go with thee; he will not fail thee, nor forsake thee.

Hebrews 13:6 - So that we may boldly say, The Lord [is] my helper, and I will not fear what man shall do unto me.

1 Peter 5:7 - Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you.

Joshua 1:9 - Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the LORD thy God [is] with thee whithersoever thou goest.

Hebrews 13:5-6 - [Let your] conversation [be] without covetousness; [and be] content with such things as ye have: for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee.


Romans 8:28 - And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to [his] purpose.

Psalms 55:22 - Cast thy burden upon the LORD, and he shall sustain thee: he shall never suffer the righteous to be moved. 


Here she is now, still mourning her husband of 40 years of marriage, passing away, leaving her alone to fight off the predators of the day, who seek after the vulnerable, defenseless widows who now have lost their “covering.” 


“You don’t love me!” She so boldly cried out in her anger toward her beloved Father in heaven.  Like a little child screaming in her pain, she wanted Him to take it away immediately, not knowing that brokenness creates the pure character of God.   


In this state, she was extremely susceptible to those pretending to be her friend, claiming even to be believers in Christ. She needed the Love and protection during this most vulnerable time in her life.  "Where did all her friends and family go?" She exclaimed in her lonelinesss.  It was as if they thought they could "catch" what she had in her grief. They didn't want any part of it. One of her sisters visited her from across the country. But other than that, no one came to encourage her or love on her. Where was her family? She had been abandoned by all those who were close to her . . .  except her son, and daughter.  

Her son and her daughter stuck to her like glue however. "Thank God I have them." She pondered what it would be like without them.

James 1:27

Pure religion and undefiled before God and the Father is this, To visit the fatherless and widows in their affliction, and to keep himself unspotted from the world.


Emotionally, she could not handle all the stresses that come with death; the grief, the loneliness, and the pain in her body (for she had become disabled). She had to dissolve a business of 30 years; she had to pay off many debts including the hospital; she had to move away from her home into another home, and create a new life for her and her family. She had to sell property and things. IRS even audited her in her intense time of grief all in the first year of her husband's death! She was wide open to attack, for it is when the enemy comes in like a flood. . . but it's not over, until it's over! God will have the last say!


1 Peter 5:8   Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour:  KJV


However, deep down in her heart, the Intercessor knew the truth, but the pain was too much for her and fear had crept in like a slithering python squeezing the hope right out of her. By all appearances, she was defeated and totally alone.  She had become an outcast, joining the exclusive club of widows with broken hearts, in deep mourning, struggling to make ends meet, lamenting over the sorrow, fighting off the wiles of the devil. Her friends and extended family totally abandoning her when she desperately needed them most!


She spent 6 times in the emergency ward at the hospital. The last time she almost died due to her broken heart.  Yes, you can die of a "broken heart."  It's hard to believe that those closest to her would leave her to war against the devil by her self. That morning, the Intercessor heard the small still voice of the Holy Spirit telling her to go to her cardiologist. In obedience, she called to set up an appointment, and of course, her doctor wasn't available. There happened to be, however, a "new" cardiologist who just joined the practise and was looking for clientel. He "happened" to have an 11:00 am space available. So she took it. The doctor's office "happened" to be right next to the hospital.


She collapsed in the doctor's office while there, and they monitored her (broken) heart. Her blood pressure had soared to 225/125. The nurses gave her three "sprays" of nitro-glycerin over a period of one hour to no avail. They immediately sent her to the emergency at the hospital to prevent . . . death. The Lord knew what was going on and He devinely intervened. It was not her time to go. 


Endlessly, it has been an excruciating two years of grief. "When will I stop feeling this pain!" She cried out in despair. "I want to forget this reproach of my widowhood!" She lamented. "Fill this deep void please, it was promised!" She had heard a Word from God before her husband had passed away and now desperately cried out to the Lord that God's word does not come back void any longer. In her exhaustion, she really wanted it. The Lord had directed her during prayer time to the following verses in the Bible:


Isaiah 54:4-8   4“Do not be afraid; you will not be put to shame.Do not fear disgrace; you will not be humiliated.You will forget the shame of your youth and remember no more the reproach of your widowhood.

5For your Maker is your husband—the Lord Almighty is his name—the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer;he is called the God of all the earth.

6The Lord will call you back as if you were a wife deserted and distressed in spirit—

a wife who married young, only to be rejected,” says your God.

7“For a brief moment I abandoned you, but with deep compassion I will bring you back.

8In a surge of anger I hid my face from you for a moment,

but with everlasting kindnessI will have compassion on you,”says the Lord your Redeemer.


"I want to forget this horrible time in my life God!" "Please God, help me to forget!"

 ...."I am watching over My word to perform it".... Jeremiah 1:12b NASB


It was time to rise up and climb out of her hole of self-pity and reach out to the only One who could help her at this time, just as He was always with her from the beginning of her life. Though He had revealed Himself to her countless times and had given her visions and numerous dreams of hope, she would waiver from time to time falling away from her relationship with the Lord over the years.  


As she struggled to ascend above the circumstances, she grasped for the only One who truly loved and cared about her, finally surrendering totally to Yahshua (Jesus), to her Abba (Father in Heaven) and to her Comforter (Holy  Spirit - Ruach HaKodesh). They were able to now help her resurrect back up above her circumstances once again and on the right path of healing. Forgiveness was her first step. The Lord would take her on through the necessary steps in His timing. 


It was time to go on with her life now (without her spouse). Yahshua is now her beloved "husband" according to the Word of God. She must put her trust in Him, and in Him alone. She has been diagnosed with Congestive Heart failure due to  stress-induced cardiomyopathy (broken heart syndrome) and must take life easier, spending time each day with the Lord surrendering her problems of the day to the only one she can trust. Her life has slowed way down since her husband's death. Her relationship with the Lord has become an intimate loving relationship now and she thanks Him every day for His goodness  with many tears flowing from His Love poured out to her. She is even grateful for the adversity. 

King James Bible (Cambridge Ed.)

Romans 8:28

And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.


It seems that God had all the answers to her dilemmas throughout her life, even during this most sorrowful time of her existence on earth. Losing someone you deeply love is probably one of the most painful. God never left her nor forsook her thus far, and He will never do so in her future--even though all others will. So be encouraged beloved reader. He is no respecter of persons. He will do the same for you . . . only surrender and ask. 


 King James Bible (Cambridge Ed.)

Matthew 11:28-30
Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. 

29 Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls.

30 For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.

King James Bible


1 The Spirit of the Lord GOD is upon me; because the LORD hath anointed me to preach good tidings unto the meek; he hath sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to them that are bound;

2 To proclaim the acceptable year of the LORD, and the day of vengeance of our God; to comfort all that mourn;

3 To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the LORD, that he might be glorified.

4 And they shall build the old wastes, they shall raise up the former desolations, and they shall repair the waste cities, the desolations of many generations.


She is the one who has been directed to make this website for you Beloved! 




Healing For a Broken Heart

One of the most painful emotional experiences is that of a "broken heart" whether it be from a severed relationship or the death of a loved one. Everyone has to deal with a broken heart at some point in life because we live in a
fallen world, and, as a result, we are constantly faced with shattered dreams, unexpected losses, and hurting relationships.

For ages, songwriters have tried to capture the heart-wrenching feelings that arise from these circumstances with lyrics like, "How I am supposed to live without you when all I've been living for is gone?" and "I 'll never get over you getting over me;" as well as "You've lost that loving feeling." Yet, these emotions are not articulated as clearly as we often wish they were. Often the pain is so deep, and so excruciating that we tend to repress and deny the anguish rather than handle it properly.

But God gives hope to all those who suffer from a broken heart by promising both His abiding presence and His overflowing peace. Psalm 34:18 says that the Lord "is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit." In John 14:27 Jesus states, "Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you . . . Do not let your hearts be troubled."

Right now God can use you even in your heartache. In II Corinthians 1:3-4 Paul writes, "Praise be to God . . . the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God." Sometimes the very reason pain has been allowed into our lives is so that we can be more effective in our ministry to others.

Consider this: Can she who has never felt rejection and isolation understand the plight of a woman who battles depression and loneliness? Can he who has never lost a loved one empathize with a man who has just lost his father? Can she who has never known the pain of unrequited love minister to the teenager whose love interest has chosen someone else for a prom date?

God's purposes in allowing pain in our lives are multi-faceted. Not only does He teach us about His love and faithfulness amidst our times of sorrow, but after our grieving has ended, He gives us strength to offer words of edification to others who are experiencing similar trials. I Peter 5:9 says, " . . . Your brothers throughout the world are undergoing the same kind of sufferings." Thus, we serve as both a support base and a hope for those who are walking through difficult situations proving that with God's help even seemingly insurmountable obstacles can be overcome.

If you are struggling with emotional pain, take comfort in the fact that God has your situation as well as you in the palm of His hands. He will not let you go, and He will not let you down. A final word of hope can be found in I Peter 5:10, "And the God of all grace, who called you . . . , after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, form, and steadfast." Take heart, the pain you experience today may be your platform for ministry tomorrow.



God I need You now! My Heart is so BROKEN!
God can heal your broken heart!
There is grace and forgiveness . . .
Get quiet and Listen to the Comforter . . .
I'm broken . . .
Darkness can be turned to light . . .
Help me . . . are You here God?
Be encouraged . . . there is hope
Go to the right side of this website and click the other topics . . . A thread of hope, Widow's corner, Tears in a Bottle, or Prophecy for your encouragement. . . Be blessed!

Did Jesus (Yahshua - Hebrew) die of a broken heart?

David Terasaka, M.D.
Medical Aspects of the Crucifixion of Jesus Christ


Heb 12:2 - "Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God."

In the last few hours of Jesus' life what did He endure, and what shame did He suffer?

EXCRUCIATE: to cause great agony, torment

Latin : ex : out of, from cruciate : cross

"from the cross"

The tone of this presentation can best be summarized in the word"excruciate", (the root of the word "excruciating") which refers to something which causes great agony or torment. The Latin roots of the word are :"ex", meaning from or out of, and "cruciate", meaning cross. The word "excruciate" comes from the Latin for "from, or out of, the cross".(Websters)


Jesus spent the last hours before the crucifixion at several places in Jerusalem. He started the evening in the Upper Room, in southwest Jerusalem. At the Last Supper, He told the disciples that His body and His blood were to be given for them.(Matt 26: 26-29) He went outside of the city to the Garden of Gethesemane. He was then arrested and brought back to the to the palace of the High Priest. where He was questioned by Annas, a former High Priest, and Caiaphas, Annas' son in law . Afterwards, He was tried by the Sanhedrin, and found to be guilty of blasphemy by proclaiming Himself the Son of God. He was sentenced to the death penalty. Since only the Romans were able to execute criminals, He was sent to Pontius Pilate at the Antonia Fortress. Pilate, not finding anything wrong, sent Him to King Herod , who returned Him back to Pilate. Pilate, submitting to the pressure of the crowd, then ordered that Jesus be flogged and crucified. He was finally led out of the city walls to be crucified at Calvary.



It is reasonable to assume that Jesus was in good health prior to the ordeal that He faced in the hours before His death. Having been a carpenter and traveling throughout the land during His ministry would have required that He would be in good physical condition. Before the crucifixion, however, He was forced to walk 2.5 miles over a sleepless night, during which He suffered great anguish through His six trials, was mocked, ridiculed and severely beaten, and was abandoned by His friends and Father. (Edwards)


The ordeal began in an upper room of a house at what we now call the Last Supper, where Jesus, in giving the first communion, predicted that His body and blood would be given.(Matt 26:17-29) Today in Jerusalem, one can visit the Cenacle or Cenaculum (Latin for dining hall), a room which is built over what is believed to be the site of the Upper Room, (Kollek) which was located on the southwestern aspect of the old city.

GETHESEMANE : oil press

Luke 22:44 And being in anguish, he prayed more earnestly, and his sweat was like drops of blood falling to the ground.

"the Spirit of God ....crushed"

From the upper room, Jesus went outside of the city walls where he spent time in prayer at the Garden of Gethesemane. The garden has many ancient olive trees today, some of which may have grown from the roots of the trees that were present in Jesus' time. (All trees in and around Jerusalem were cut down when the Romans conquered the city in 70 A.D. Olive trees can regenerate from their roots and live for thousands of years.) The name "Gethesemane", comes from the Hebrew Gat Shmanim, meaning "oil press" (Kollek). Since "oil" is used in the Bible to symbolize the Holy Spirit, it may be said that the garden is where "the Spirit of God was crushed".(Missler). It was here that Jesus agonized in prayer over what was to occur. It is significant that this is the only place in the KJV where the word "agony" is mentioned.(Strong's concordance) The Greek word for agony means to be "engaged in combat" (Pink) Jesus agonizes over what He is to go through, feeling that He is at the point of death.(Mark14:34) Yet He prays, "Not my will, but thine be done."

Of medical significance is that Luke mentions Him as having sweat like blood. The medical term for this, "hemohidrosis" or "hematidrosis" has been seen in patients who have experienced, extreme stress or shock to their systems. (Edwards) The capillaries around the sweat pores become fragile and leak blood into the sweat. A case history is recorded in which a young girl who had a fear of air raids in WW1 developed the condition after a gas explosion occurred in the house next door.(Scott)) Another report mentions a nun who, as she was threatened with death by the swords of the enemy soldiers," was so terrified that she bled from every part of her body and died of hemorrhage in the sight of her assailants."(Grafenberg) As a memorial to Jesus' ordeal, a church which now stands in Gethesemane is known as the Church of the Agony. (also called the Church of the Nations because many nations donated money to its construction.(Kollek)


Matthew 26:56"Then all the disciples deserted him and fled."

Psa 22:11"Do not be far from me, for trouble is near and there is no one to help."

While in Gethesemane, Jesus is betrayed by Judas and arrested by the Jews. His disciples all desert Him, even at the expense of running away naked (Mark 14:51-52). He is bound (John 18:12) then brought back to the city to the court of the High Priest, which is located near the Upper room.


Following are some of the illegal aspects of the trial of Jesus:
  • Trials could occur only in the regular meeting places of the Sanhedrin (not in the palace of the High Priest)
  • Trials could not occur on the eve of the Sabbath or Feast Days or at night
  • A sentence of 'guilty' might only be pronounced on the day following the trial


Deut 19:15"One witness is not enough to convict a man accused of any crime or offense he may have committed. A matter must be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses."

Deut 17:6"On the testimony of two or three witnesses a man shall be put to death, but no one shall be put to death on the testimony of only one witness."

Mark 14:56"Many testified falsely against him, but their statements did not agree."

While in the court of the High Priest, He was questioned by Annas (John 18:13) and struck by a soldier (John 18: 22). He was then brought to Caiaphas and the Sanhedrin. who sought to put Jesus to death by the false testimony of many witnesses. The witnesses brought against Him did not agree. By the law, no one could be put to death without the agreement of two or three witnesses. Although the witnesses did not agree, He was found guilty of blasphemy when He told them of His identity as the Son of God. He was sentenced to death. Jesus suffered ridicule from the palace guards, who spat on Him, beat Him and slapped Him on the face.(Mark 14:65.) During the trial, Peter denies Him three times. The proceedings of Jesus' trial violated many of the laws of His society. Among some of the other broken laws were:(Bucklin)

  1. Any arrest could not be made at night.
  2. The time and date of the trial were illegal because it took place at night and on the eve of the Sabbath. This time precluded any chance for the required adjournment to the next day in the event of a conviction.
  3. The Sanhedrin was without authority to instigate charges. It was only supposed to investigate charges brought before it. In Jesus' trial, the court itself formulated the charges.
  4. The charges against Jesus were changed during the trial. He was initially charged with blasphemy based upon His statement that He would be able to destroy and rebuild the Temple of God within three days, as well as His claim to be the Son of God. When He was brought before Pilate, the charge was that Jesus was a King and did not advocate paying taxes to the Romans.
  5. As stated above, the requirement of two witnesses in agreement to merit the death penalty was not met.
  6. The court did not meet in the regular meeting place of the Sanhedrin, as required by Jewish law.
  7. Christ was not permitted a defense. Under Jewish law, an exhaustive search into the facts presented by the witnesses should have occurred.
  8. The Sanhedrin pronounced the death sentence. Under law, the Sanhedrin were not allowed to convict and put the death sentence into effect. (John 18:31)


Today, one can visit the palace of the High Priest. where one can stand in the midst of the ruins of the courtyard. A model of the structure in Jesus' time is available for viewing.


Mark 15:15 - "Wanting to satisfy the crowd, Pilate released Barabbas to them. He had Jesus flogged, and handed him over to be crucified."

The Sanhedrin met early the next morning and sentenced Him to death. (Matthew 27:1) Because the Jews were not, and the Romans were, able to carry out an execution, Jesus was brought before Pilate. The charge was now changed to an allegation that Jesus claimed to be King and forbade the nation to pay taxes to Caesar. (Luke 23:5) In spite of all the charges, Pilate finds nothing wrong. He sends Jesus to Herod. Jesus is speechless before Herod, except to affirm that He is King of the Jews. Herod sends Him back to Pilate. Pilate is unable to convince the crowds of Jesus' innocence and orders Jesus to be put to death. Some sources state that it was Roman law that a criminal that was to be crucified had to be flogged first.(McDowell) Others believe that Jesus was flogged first by Pilate in the hope of getting Him off with a lighter punishment .(Davis) In spite of his efforts, the Jews allow Barabbas to be released and demand that Jesus be crucified, even crying that ,"His blood be on us and on our children!"(Matthew 27:25) Pilate hands Jesus over to be flogged and crucified.

It is at this point that Jesus suffers a severe physical beating. (Edwards) During a flogging, a victim was tied to a post, leaving his back entirely exposed. The Romans used a whip, called a flagrum or flagellum which consisted of small pieces of bone and metal attached to a number of leather strands. The number of strikes is not recorded in the gospels. The number of blows in Jewish law was set in Deuteronomy 25:3 at forty, but later reduced to 39 to prevent excessive blows by a counting error. (Holmans). The victim often died from the beating. (39 hits were believed to bring the criminal to "one from death".) Roman law did not put any limits on the number of blows given. (McDowell) During the flogging, the skin was stripped from the back, exposing a bloody mass of muscle and bone ("hamburger " : Metherall). Extreme blood loss occurred from this beating, weakening the victim. perhaps to the point of being unconscious.


Matthew 27:28-30 (The soldiers) stripped him and put a scarlet robe 
on him and then twisted together a crown of thorns and set it on his head. They put a staff in his right hand and knelt in front of him and mocked him. "Hail, king of the Jews!" they said. They spit on him, and took the staff and struck him on the head again and again. Jesus was then beaten by the Roman soldiers. In mockery, they dressed Him in what was probably the cloak of a Roman officer, which was colored dark purple or scarlet .(Amplified Bible) He also wore the crown of thorns. Unlike the traditional crown which is depicted by an open ring, the actual crown of thorns may have covered the entire scalp.(Lumpkin) The thorns may have been 1 to 2 inches long. The gospels state that the Roman soldiers continued to beat Jesus on the head. The blows would drive the thorns into the scalp (one of the most vascular areas of the body) and forehead, causing severe bleeding.


Genesis 3:17-18"Cursed is the ground because of you; through painful toil you will eat of it all the days of your life. It will produce thorns and thistles for you, and you will eat the plants of the field."Isaiah 1:18 "Come now, let us reason together," says the LORD."Though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red as crimson, they shall be like wool." The significance of the scarlet robe and crown of thorns is to emphasize Jesus' taking the sins of the world upon His body. The Bible describes sin by the color of scarlet (Is 1:18) and that thorns first appeared after the fall, as a sign of the curse. Thus, the articles that He wore are symbols to show that Jesus took on the sins (and the curse) of the world upon Himself. It is not clear that He wore the crown of thorns on the cross. Matthew describes that the Romans removed His clothes after the beating, and that they put His own clothes back on Him. (Matt 27:31)


Isaiah 50:6"I offered my back to those who beat me, my cheeks to those who pulled out my beard; I did not hide my face from mocking and spitting."


Isaiah 52:14"..... Just as there were many who were appalled at him -- his appearance was so disfigured beyond that of any man and his form marred beyond human likeness--"

The severity of the beating is not detailed in the gospels. However, in the book of Isaiah, it suggests that the Romans pulled out His beard.(Isaiah 50:8) . It is also mentions that Jesus was beaten so severely that His form did not look like that of "a son of a man" i.e. that of a human being. The literal translation of the verse reads, "So marred from the form of man was His aspect, that His appearance was not as that of a son of a man." People were appalled to look at Him (Isaiah 52:13). His disfigurement may explain why He was not easily recognized in His post resurrection appearances.(Missler) Today, one can visit a site known as the Lithostrotos, traditionally believed to be the floor of the Antonio Fortress.(although recent excavations may cast doubt on this theory (Gonen)) The floor is marked for games once played by the Roman soldiers

From the beating, Jesus walked on a path, now known as the Via Dolorosa or the "way of suffering", to be crucified at Golgotha. The total distance has been estimated at 650 yards. (Edwards). A narrow street of stone, it was probably surrounded by markets in Jesus' time. He was led through the crowded streets carrying the crossbar of the cross(called a patibulum) across His shoulders. The crossbar probably weighed between 80 to 110 pounds. He was surrounded by a guard of Roman soldiers, one of which carried a titulus, a sign which announced His crime of being "the King of the Jews" in Hebrew, Latin and Greek. On the way, He was unable to carry the cross. Some theorize that he may have fallen while going down the steps of the Antonio Fortress. A fall with the heavy patibulum on His back may have led to a contusion of the heart, predisposing His heart to rupture on the cross. (Ball) Simon of Cyrene (currently North Africa (Tripoli)), who apparently was affected by these events, was summoned to help.

The present Via Dolorosa was marked in the 16th century as the route over which Christ was led to His crucifixion.(Magi) As is the location of Calvary, the true location of the Via Dolorosa is disputed. Much tradition as to what happened to Jesus is encountered on the Via Dolorosa today. There are 14 stations of 'events' that occurred and 9 churches on the way today. The stations of the cross were established in the 1800's. (Magi) Today, there is one section of the path where one can walk on the stones which were used during Jesus time.


Psalm 22:16-17Dogs have surrounded me; a band of evil men has encircled me, they have pierced my hands and my feet. I can count all my bones; people stare and gloat over me."


The crucifixion event is prophesied in several places throughout the Old Testament. One of the most striking is recorded in Isaiah 52:13 ,where it says that , "My servant will act wisely (or prosper) .He will be raised and lifted up and greatly exalted." In John 3, Jesus talks about His fulfillment of that prophecy when He says, "Just as Moses lifted up the snake in the desert, so the Son of Man must be lifted up that everyone who believes in Him may have eternal life." He refers to the events recorded in Numbers 21:6-9. The Lord had sent a plague of fiery serpents on the people of Israel and they bit the people so that many of the people died. After the people confessed their sin to Moses, the Lord for gave them by having a bronze serpent made. Bronze is a symbol for judgment and the serpent is a symbol of the curse. Whoever was bitten by a serpent and then looked at the bronze serpent, was saved from death.. These verses are prophecies that point to the crucifixion, in the Jesus would be (lifted up ) on the cross for the judgment of sin, so that whoever believed in Him should not die (an eternal death), but live an eternal life. II Cor 5 :21 amplifies this point, in that "He (the Father) made Him who knew no sin (the Son) to be sin on our behalf, so that we might become the righteousness of God in Him."(Pink) It is interesting that the sign of Aesculapius which is the symbol of the medical profession today, had its roots from the making of the bronze serpent.(Metherall) Indeed, Jesus is the healer of all! Jesus is led to the place of the skull (Latin Calvary, Aramaic :Golgotha) to be crucified. The actual location of Calvary is also in dispute. At the end of the Via Dolorosa, there is a "T intersection". If one turns left, we go to the Church of the Holy Sepulcher. If one turns to the right, one goes to Gordon's Calvary. The Church of the Holy sepulcher has long been believed to be the traditional site of the crucifixion.

Gordon's Calvary has a possible prophetic reason for being the actual site of the crucifixion .In Genesis 22, Abraham is tested by God to sacrifice Isaac on the top of a mountain. Realizing that he is acting out a prophecy, that "God Himself will provide a Lamb" , Abraham calls the place of the event "Jehovah Jireh", meaning "In the mount of the Lord it shall be seen." If we take this as a prophetic event of Jesus' death, then Jesus' died on the high ground of Jerusalem. Gordon's Calvary is the highest point of Jerusalem, 777 meters above sea level.(Missler: Map from Israel tour book) Today, at Gordon's Calvary, caves in the rock are situated which give the site the appearance of a skull.

Jesus was then crucified. Crucifixion was a practice that originated with the Persians and was later passed on to the Carthaginians and the Phoenicians. The Romans perfected it as a method of execution which caused maximal pain and suffering over a period of time. Those crucified included slaves, provincials and the lowest types of criminals. Roman citizens, except perhaps for soldiers who deserted, were not subjected to this treatment. (McDowell)

The crucifixion site "was purposely chosen to be outside the city walls because the Law forbade such within the city walls...for sanitary reasons ... the crucified body was sometimes left to rot on the cross and serve as a disgrace, a convincing warning and deterrent to passers by." (Johnson) Sometimes, the subject was eaten while alive and still on the cross by wild beasts. (Lipsius)

The procedure of crucifixion may be summarized as follows. The patibulum was put on the ground and the victim laid upon it. Nails, about 7 inches long and with a diameter of 1 cm ( roughly 3/8 of an inch) were driven in the wrists . The points would go into the vicinity of the median nerve, causing shocks of pain to radiate through the arms. It was possible to place the nails between the bones so that no fractures (or broken bones) occurred. Studies have shown that nails were probably driven through the small bones of the wrist, since nails in the palms of the hand would not support the weight of a body. In ancient terminology, the wrist was considered to be part of the hand. (Davis) Standing at the crucifixion sites would be upright posts, called stipes, standing about 7 feet high.(Edwards) In the center of the stipes was a crude seat, called a sedile or sedulum, which served a support for the victim. The patibulum was then lifted on to the stipes. The feet were then nailed to the stipes. To allow for this, the knees had to be bent and rotated laterally, being left in a very uncomfortable position. The titulus was hung above the victim's head.

There were several different types of crosses used during crucifixion. In Jesus' time, it was most likely that the cross used was a T shaped (or tau cross,), not the popular Latin, or t shaped cross which is accepted today.(Lumpkin)


Psalm 22:14-15"I am poured out like water, and all my bones are out of joint. My heart has turned to wax; it has melted away within me. My strength is dried up like a potsherd, and my tongue sticks to the roof of my mouth; you lay me in the dust of death."


Having suffered from the beatings and flogging, Jesus suffered from severe hypovolemia from the loss of blood. The verses above describe His dehydrated state and loss of His strength.

When the cross was erected upright, there was tremendous strain put on the wrists, arms and shoulders, resulting in a dislocation of the shoulder and elbow joints.(Metherall) The arms, being held up and outward, held the rib cage in a fixed end inspiratory position which made it extremely difficult to exhale, and impossible to take a full breath. The victim would only be able to take very shallow breaths.(This may explain why Jesus made very short statements while on the cross). As time passed, the muscles, from the loss of blood, last of oxygen and the fixed position of the body, would undergo severe cramps and spasmodic contractions


Matthew 27:46"About the ninth hour Jesus cried out in a loud voice, "Eloi, Eloi, lama sabachthani?'--which means, My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?"

With the sin of the world upon Him, Jesus suffered spiritual death (separation from the Father ). Isaiah 59:2 says that sins cause a separation from God, and that He hides His face from you so that He does not hear. The Father must turn away from His Beloved Son on the cross. For the first time, Jesus does not address God as His Father.(Courson)


  1. Shallowness of breathing causes small areas of lung collapse.
  2. Decreased oxygen and increased carbon dioxide causes acidic conditions in the tissues.
  3. Fluid builds up in the lungs. Makes situation in step 2 worse.
  4. Heart is stressed and eventually fails.

The slow process of suffering and resulting death during a crucifixion may be summarized as follows:

"...it appears likely that the mechanism of death in crucifixion was suffocation. The chain of events which ultimately led to suffocation are as follows: With the weight of the body being supported by the sedulum, the arms were pulled upward. This caused the intercostal and pectoral muscles to be stretched. Furthermore, movement of these muscles was opposed by the weight of the body. With the muscles of respiration thus stretched, the respiratory bellows became relatively fixed. As dyspnea developed and pain in the wrists and arms increased, the victim was forced to raise the body off the sedulum, thereby transferring the weight of the body to the feet. Respirations became easier, but with the weight of the body being exerted on the feet, pain in the feet and legs mounted. When the pain became unbearable, the victim again slumped down on the sedulum with the weight of the body pulling on the wrists and again stretching the intercostal muscles. Thus, the victim alternated between lifting his body off the sedulum in order to breathe and slumping down on the sedulum to relieve pain in the feet. Eventually , he became exhausted or lapsed into unconsciousness so that he could no longer lift his body off the sedulum. In this position, with the respiratory muscles essentially paralyzed, the victim suffocated and died. (DePasquale and Burch)

Due to the shallow breathing, the victim's lungs begin to collapse in small areas. causing hypoxia and hypercarbia. A respiratory acidosis, with lack of compensation by the kidneys due to the loss of blood from the numerous beatings, resulted in an increased strain on the heart, which beats faster to compensate. Fluid builds up in the lungs. . Under the stress of hypoxia and acidosis the heart eventually fails. There are several different theories on the actual cause of death. One theory states that there was a filling of the pericardium with fluid, which put a fatal strain on the ability of the heart to pump blood (Lumpkin). Another theory states that Jesus died of cardiac rupture." (Bergsma) The actual cause of Jesus' death, however, "may have been multifactorial and related primarily to hypovolemic shock, exhaustion asphyxia and perhaps acute heart failure."(Edwards) A fatal cardiac arrhythmia may have caused the final terminal event. (Johnson, Edwards)


John 19:29-30 "A jar of wine vinegar was there, so they soaked a sponge in it, put the sponge on a stalk of the hyssop plant, and lifted it to Jesus' lips." When he had received the drink, Jesus said, `It is finished'. "With that, he bowed his head and gave up his spirit."

Having suffered severe blood losses from His numerous beatings and thus in a dehydrated state, Jesus, in one of His final statements, said "I thirst." He was offered 2 drinks on the cross. The first, which He refused, was a drugged wine (mixed with myrrh). He chose to face death without a clouded mind. Edersheim writes:

"It was a merciful Jewish practice to give to those led to execution a draught of strong wine mixed with myrrh so as to deaden consciousness" (Mass Sem 2.9; Bemid. R. 10). This charitable office was performed at the cost of, if not by, an association of women in Jerusalem (Sanh. 43a). The draught was offered to Jesus when He reached Golgotha. But having tasted it....He would not drink it. ....He would meet Death, even in his sternest and fiercest mood, and conquer by submitting to the full....(p.880).

The second drink, which He accepts moments before His death, is described as a wine vinegar. Two points are important to note. The drink was given on the "stalk of a hyssop plant". Remember that these events occurred at the Feast of the Passover. During this feast, (Exod 12:22) hyssop was used to apply the blood of the Passover lamb to the wooden doorposts of the Jews. It is interesting the end of this hyssop stalk pointed to the blood of the Perfect Lamb which was applied to the wooden cross for the salvation of all mankind. (Barclay) In addition, the wine vinegar is a product of fermentation, which is made from grape juice and yeast. The word literally means "that which is soured" and is related to the Hebrew term for "that which is leavened". (Holmans) Yeast or leaven, is a Biblical symbol of sin. When Jesus took this drink, (i.e. a drink which was "leavened") it is thus symbolic of His taking the sins of the world into His body.


Psalm 22:12-13"Many bulls surround me; strong bulls of Bashanencircle me. Roaring lions tearing their prey open their mouths wide against me."

While He was on the cross, darkness covered the land (noon to three p.m.). Jesus, in Luke 22:53, associates those who arrested Him with the power of darkness. Where were the evil forces while Jesus was on the cross? The verses above from Psalm 22 seem out of place when first read. There seems to be no mention of "bulls" and "lions" around the cross. The verses, however, have a deeper meaning.(Courson) Bashan was an area to the east of the Jordan River which was famous for its fertility. Cattle were raised there which grew to enormous sizes. The people there worshipped demon spirits (associated with Baal) within the cattle. In 1 Pet 5:8, Satan is described as "a roaring lion...seeking those who he may devour" These verses are thus suggestive of the spiritual activity of Satan and his demons, celebrating as Jesus was suffering on the cross.


John 10:17-18 "The reason my Father loves me is that I lay down my life--only to take it up again. No one takes it from me, but I lay it down on my own accord. I have authority to lay it down and authority to take it up again. This command I received from my Father."

Luke 23:46 "Jesus called out with a loud voice, 'Father, into your hands I commit my spirit'." When he had said this, he breathed his last.

The average time of suffering before death by crucifixion is stated to be about 2-4 days(Tenney), although there are reported cases where the victims lived for 9 days.(Lipsius) The actual causes of death by crucifixion were multifactorial, one of the most significant would have been the severity of the scourging. (Edwards) Jesus died a quick physical death (Pilate was surprised that He had died so soon.(Mark 15:44)). While many of the physical signs preceding death were present, one possibility is that Jesus did not die by physical factors which ended His ability to live, but that He gave up His life of His own accord. His last statement, "Into your hands I commit my Spirit" seems to show that Jesus' death occurred by giving Himself up. In John 10, He states that only He has the power to lay down His life. He proved His power over death by His resurrection. Truly, God is the one who has power over life and death


HASTENED by the breaking of the legs, so that the victim could not push up to take a good breath.

John 19:32-33The soldiers therefore came and broke the legs of the first man who had been crucified with Jesus, and then those of the other. But when they came to Jesus and found that he was already dead, they did not break his legs.

CONFIRMED by a spear thrust into the right side of the heart.

John 19:34Instead, one of the soldiers pierced Jesus' side with a spear, bringing a sudden flow of blood and water.Death in crucifixion was hastened by the breaking of the legs of the victim. This procedure, called crurifracture, prevented the ability of the victim to take in a good breath. Death would quickly occur from suffocation. In Jesus' case, He died quickly and did not have His legs broken. Jesus fulfills one of the prophetic requirements of the Passover Lamb, that not a bone shall be broken.(Exodus 12:46John 19:36)

To confirm that a victim was dead, the Romans inflicted a spear wound through the right side of the heart. When pierced, a sudden flow of blood and water came Jesus' body . The medical significance of the blood and water has been a matter of debate. One theory states that Jesus died of a massive myocardial infarction, in which the heart ruptured (Bergsma) which may have resulted from His falling while carrying the cross. (Ball) Another theory states that Jesus' heart was surrounded by fluid in the pericardium, which constricted the heart and caused death.(Davis) The physical stresses of crucifixion may have produced a fatal cardiac arrhythmia. (Johnson)

The stated order of "blood and water" may not necessarily indicate the order of appearance, but rather the relative prominence of each fluid. In this case, a spear through the right side of the heart would allow the pleural fluid (fluid built up in the lungs) to escape first, followed by a flow of blood from the wall of the right ventricle.(Edwards) The important fact is that the medical evidence supports that Jesus did die a physical death.

The story, of course, does not end here. The greatest event that separates Jesus from all others is the fact that He rose again and lives today. He intercedes for those who follow Him at the right hand of the Father.(Heb 7:25)


Revelation 5:6Then I saw a Lamb, looking as if it had been slain, standing in the center of the throne, encircled by the four living creatures and the elders.

In eternity, Jesus will bear the marks of His crucifixion.Rev 5:6suggests that He appears in heaven with the marks as a Lamb"looking as if it had been slain". We know that when He appeared to Thomas that He bore the scars of the nails and the spear in His side.(John 20:26-28) It is also worth considering reasons as to why He was not immediately recognized after His resurrection. In John 21:12, it is stated that the disciples did "not dare to ask Him His identity, because they knew that it was the Lord." It is possible that His resurrection body still has the marks of His beatings. "The body of His glorification will be the body of His humiliation." (Missler)


Are we ready to meet Him? What have we done with what He has given to us?. Today, He encourages us to consider the cost of the cross and to apply it to our own lives.


Luke 9:23Then he said to them all: "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me."

When He was on earth, Jesus stated that , "If any man would come after me, let him take up his cross daily and follow me." (Luke 9:23) As we have seen, in Jesus' time it meant going to your death, giving up and separating yourself from all that you had.......your rights, your friends, your body and blood and even your "god", to follow Him.

We are challenged by the example of Simon of Cyrene. Scripture mentions Him as being the father of Alexander and Rufus.(Mark 15:21) Rufus ("a choice man in the Lord") and Simon's wife were both addressed by Paul in his letter to the Roman church. (Romans 16:13) Here was a man, who indeed carried the cross...and made an impact for Christ in eternity. What commitment are you willing to make to Him now?

The Bible, God's Word (II Timothy 3:16-17), relates how God once had a personal relationship with man. God would talk and relate to man, just as you might relate to your best friend. God created man to give him a meaningful and purposeful life.

Man chose to go his own way by disobeying God. (This applies to all men as in Romans 3:23). This disobedience, called sin, caused a break in the relationship between man and God. If a man casually seeks a relationship with God by his own efforts (religion), he will find nothing, because sin has broken the communication. (Isaiah 59:2)

Christianity is the story of God sacrificing His Son to restore a relationship that was broken. As stated in the above text, Jesus gave up His life to pay for the sins of mankind and taking the punishment for the sin upon Himself. Because He gave His life on the cross, any one who believes in Him will have a restoration of a personal relationship with God. Jesus Himself claimed to be the only way to God (John 14:6) and only by the knowledge of God through Jesus Christ can man have a meaningful and purposeful life.(John 10:10)

God desires that all men come to know Him in a personal way. If you have never received Jesus' gift of Himself for your sins , or have any doubts to how you can have a meaningful and purposeful life by the kinowledge of God through Jesus Christ, you can start by praying a simple prayer, such as:

Dear Lord Jesus. Thank you for dying on the cross for me. I confess that I am a sinner before God. I acknowledge that by your death and sacrifice that you have paid the penalty of my sins for me. Please come into my heart and become the Lord of my life.As you gave your life, I give my life to you. I will take up my cross and follow you, not as I will, but to follow Your perfect will for my life. In Jesus Name, Amen.

If you have prayed this prayer, please let us know by e-mail. It would be a real blessing to us. Or if you have any further questions about the work of Jesus on the cross, please send Dr. Terasaka e-mail at:terasaka@dreamscape.com.

Would you like to know more about how you can have a personal relationship with God? If so, click here


Ball, D. A. "The Crucifixion and Death of a Man Called Jesus". J Miss St Med Assoc 30(3): 77-83, 1989.

Barclay, William. "The Gospel of John Volume 2" Westminister Press, Philadelphia, Pa.,. 1975.

Bergsma, Stuart. "Did Jesus Die of a Broken Heart?". The Calvin Forum, 14:165, 1948.

Bible, Amplified version. Zondervan Publishing House, Grand Rapids, Michigan, 1964.

Bucklin, R.. "The Legal and Medical Aspects of the Trial and Death of Christ". Med Sci Law. 10:14-26, 1970.

Courson, Jon. "Why Psalms 22?" (tape) Firefighters for Christ, Westminister California.

Davis, C.T. "The Crucifixion of Jesus :The Passion of Christ from a Medical Point of View". Ariz Med 22:183-187, 1965.

DePasquale, N. P. and Burch, G.E. "Death by Crucifixion", Am Heart J 66(3):. 434-435, 1963.

Edersheim, A. "TheLife and Times of Jesus the Messiah". Hendrickson Publishers, Inc. Peabody, Massachusetts, 1993.

Edwards, W.D., Gabel, W.J and Hosmer, F.E. "On the Physical Death of Jesus Christ." JAMA. 255 (11), pp. 1455-1463, 1986.

Gonen, R. "Biblical Holy Places : an illustrated guide",Palphot Ltd. Israel 1994

Grafenberg, J. S.."Observ.Medic.," Lib.III. p.458.

Holman's Bible Dictionary, Holman Bible Publishers, 1991.

Johnson, C.."Medical and Cardiological Aspects of the Passion and Crucifixion of Jesus, the Christ", Bol Asoc Med P Rico 70 (3) :97-102, 1978.

Kollek, T. and Dowley, T. , "Next Year in Jerusalem", Harvest House, Eugene, Oregon, 1995.

Lipsius, Justus. "De Cruce. Libri tres, ad sacram profanamque historiam utiles. (3rd part Tom III. Opera Omnia. Antwerp, 1614)

Lumpkin,R.."The Physical Suffering of Christ", J Med Assoc Ala 47: 8-10, 1978.

Magi, G. "Israel". Casa Editrice Bonechi, Florence, Italy, 1992.

McDowell, J. "The Resurrection Factor". Campus Crusade for Christ, Nashville, Tenn., 1981.

Metherall, A.. "Christ's Physical Suffering" (Tape) Firefighters for Christ , Westminister, Ca.

Missler, C. "Isaiah 53" (Tape) Firefighters for Christ, Westminister, Ca.

Missler, C. "Israel Tour Book" 1995 Edition.

Pink, A. "The Seven Sayings of the Saviour on the Cross", Baker Book House, Grand Rapids, Michigan, 1958.

Scott, C.T. "A Case of Haematidrosis", Br Med J .1: 532-533, 1918.

Strong, J. "Strong's Concordance", MacDonald Pub Co., McLean, Va.

Tenney, S.M. "On Death By Crucifixion", Am Heart J .68(2) :286-287, 1964.

Websters Dictionary, Grosset and Dunlap, New York, 1974.

Compiled by David Terasaka, M.D. ©1996. All Rights Reserved, David Terasaka, M.D. However, permission is hereby granted to copy and distribute free of charge for non-commercial purposes only.

Get quiet and listen to the Comforter . . .

He is there waiting for you . . .


Look to the Lord


There are not many words in the Bible more amazing than these: my God will hear me. The One who spoke all things into existence, who holds in his hand billions of galaxies spanning countless light years of space, he who knows every star by name, he who has numbered every hair on every head, he who rules over all history – he hears me! Our cries of despair, our cries for relief, our cries for rescue – he hears us. The prophet Micah, knowing that God knew all his trouble, offered this response of faith: I will wait for the God of my salvation.

Our time on earth seems so long in our eyes but it is less than an instant in the eyes of the eternal God. He is working out his perfect plan upon the earth and he assures us that one day he will bring justice to the earth and he will bring to an end all the suffering and pain of his people.

So far, that day is not today. So far, I remain on the earth. So far, my troubles remain. But I will not turn to neighbors or banks or politicians or even religious leaders to provide my rescue. I will look to the Lord. I will wait for him. I will trust in his timing and his way and I will know that he hears me when I cry to him.


Oh God . . . how I need you!

Tracie 12.01.2022 04:32

this is so beautiful and such a testimony to the Lord's healing power and sanctification through our suffering. Much of my walk with Christ is similar to yours.

Friend in Christ 29.08.2021 23:23

As I read your page, the end of the seven years kept off the page to me. 31st is the 7th year. The shmita.

fellow widow 21.01.2015 06:36

your web sight is amazing !!!! may god bless you

Mara 02.07.2013 17:38

I can feel the presence of God! It's like I've never felt anything like it! Thank you for allowing God to use you as a vessel for this website.

Melisa 21.06.2013 19:31

I can't believe all the stuff in this website. Thank you for listening to God and designing this site for all the brokenhearted.

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Latest comments

09.09 | 06:52

Thank you for this! You might enjoy my take on the whole 'Christmas' story, not born on Dec 25th etc,

17.03 | 07:11

Praise God! He is so good to all of us!

16.03 | 22:20

I needed to hear this today. Its been sooo very difficult for a long time honestly asked God if I was the toxic one and just didn't realize it so I could repent

12.01 | 04:32

this is so beautiful and such a testimony to the Lord's healing power and sanctification through our suffering. Much of my walk with Christ is similar to yours.